My Thoughts on Marriage Just 9 Months In

This week, I have been married for 9 months. Just a blip on the radar in this thing we call life. It has been the biggest and best adventure I have ever embarked on. Time has literally flown by. I am so happy that I can spend forever with my best friend. Please don't get me wrong, I'm no marriage expert, but I have learned a few things though in this short time.

People are Nosey
We got married on June 21, 2014 and on June 22nd the questions started flowing..."Are you going to quit your job??" "When are you going to have kids??" The first question was easy to answer, the second, not so much. Having a child is serious business. Something that will happen when we are ready, and God knows we're ready.  I trust Him with that, but I'm still praying daily for wisdom in how to answer these questions without sounding snotty or offended.  I suppose the questions come out of general concern for our well-being, right?

Give the Best Part of You to Your SPOUSE
We both work, and work hard. We come home, and as tempting as it is to sit on the couch and decompress it is so important that we take that time and spend it together. I'm not saying we have to go on a date every night, but the element of communication in a marriage is so worth it. Save a little energy....positive energy....for when you walk through the door.  A woman that I heard speak, Tara Furman, from "Knowing God Ministries" asked during an event, "Is your dog the first person who greets your husband when he gets home?" That really made me think. P.S. you should look up Tara's Facebook/Website--you will be blessed.

Being a Wife is Hard, but Rewarding, Work. 
Being a wife is Kingdom work.  Being an obedient, loving, kind, respectful, caring, wife is Kingdom work.  I strive for the Proverbs 31 standard daily.  I also fall short daily. There are definitely times that say rude things, but I've also learned to not be scared to say "I'm sorry!" Those are powerful words. When I took the vow of marriage, it was between me, Kevin, and GOD.  A reflection of the Holy Trinity.  This relationship is Holy, and hopefully a reflection of The One who created the two of us, and destined us to be together. I love thinking about that.

I Have to Stop Comparing Myself to Other Wives
Thankfully, Kevin makes being a wife an easy job. He tells me all the time how thankful he is, and that I'm doing a good job. Then why do I second guess myself?  Why do I put unnecessary pressure on myself to be like other women and lose sight of the fact that my husband loves and appreciates me just the way I am.  That's beautiful.

Ups and Downs are INEVITABLE 
Since Kevin and I got married a lot of things have happened to us personally, relationally, inside our home, and outside of our home.  We have really taken to heart a bible verse we studied in our premarital class at church.

5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” 
Matthew 19:5-6 

In other translations the word united is written as cleave.  Biblically, cleave means to cling, or to stick like glue.  This is something we do not take lightly in our little household.  There are days that we have to close the door to the outside stuff and literally cling to each other. 

Premarital Counseling was Incredible and Worth Every Second

I hear a lot of people bash the idea of going through premarital counseling, but it was something that the pastor who performed our wedding ceremony required us to do.  I will say it was one of the most rewarding experiences I have ever had. Let me tell you, as a young married, there are so many things that you have to agree on with your spouse and a lot of these things, you won't think of on your own.  The premarital counseling class that we took, put each of those topics on the table and gave us a starting point and questions to ask and answer. This not only, opened the doors of communication, but also increased our level of comfort with each other.  It also solidified the ideas that I had about how perfect we were together.  

I'm sure that as the years tick on and our lives pass by this list will grow and grow.  God has blessed us so much and I am so thankful that I have the opportunity to spend each day loving, supporting, and helping my husband. We definitely don't have it all together, but with each other, we feel like we have it all.  

Love you, friend!