One year ago, on this day, my grandmother passed away. 365 days ago. After years of her brain being affected by Alzheimer's Disease, her body gave up the fight. In many ways, I hadn't had much of a connection to her for several years. She had forgotten my name, she had lost track of who I was, but she was always happy to see me. She always recognized me as a familiar person. If you have never experienced loving a person with Alzheimer's it is a very tough battle. It requires patience, perseverance, and a lot of love and forgiveness. It is scary and frequently frustrating. It takes a toll on close loved ones who want nothing but the best, but feel inadequate to provide it. My grandmother had Alzheimer's, but my grandmother was not Alzheimer's. There were years leading up to the diagnosis that my grandmother had a very sharp mind. In fact, I believe it was sharper than most. She had a knack for remembering little details, and telling stories. She was a great wife, sister, friend, daughter, mother, and grandmother. There have been many days since her passing that I feel her smiling down at me. There are little pieces of her around every corner of our home. Truth is, I learned a lot from that little lady. Here are some of the nuggets of wisdom I have gained.
- There is very little that chocolate cannot fix.
My grandmother always had a smorgasbord of candy in her home. An entire candy buffet. There was never any reason to go without. If the last piece of your favorite candy was gone, there was always refills.
One of my grandmother's favorite things to do was look at the clouds. Making shapes out of shapeless white wisps. Smiling up at the endless blue sky. This is a good lesson in more ways than one. Chin up, beautiful, God's got this.
No matter what, family is first. My grandmother spent years taking care of her mother who was also affected by Alzheimer's. She was an incredible wife, sister, mother, and grandmother. She took care of a lot of boo boos, emotional and physical. She raised my father to be the incredible man he is. She cherished every second of life with her husband and poured her heart and soul into her twins. Family is something you can't replace. Get together often, love them, forgive them, take care of them, cherish them.
- Celebrate the holidays to the maximum potential.
Homemade Easter baskets, Christmas hams, fireworks, birthday cakes. Birthdays are not a holiday, but they sure felt like one in her home. My grandmother never let a holiday pass without decorations and celebrating.
- Creeper mouse isn't so creepy.
This is a weird one. My grandmother used to crawl her hands on me as a young child and recite a poem in a deep, gravely voice. She did it to all of us. It honestly scared me when I was young, but it always ended with a tickle. She "creeper moused" all young children.
These were the last words that I heard my grandmother say coherently. She recited the poem to my cousin's son. They were clear, crisp, and so full of feeling. Her mind gone and her body failing.
These words were recited at her funeral...I think of them often.
"Creeper Mouse, Creeper Mouse, I'm going to Jesus' house."
My grandmother lived to be 94...she saw a LOT in her day. She dealt with the depression, development of technology, the death of her husband, and so much more. Each time she got knocked down, she got back up. Unscathed.
- Always be quiet, sit still, and listen in church.
Both of my parents were in the church choir. My mom singing and my dad directing. This left little bitty me in the care of my sweet grandmother during a long church service. Werther's Originals, gum, crayons, and a lot of pinching and elbows got me through an hour service week after week. I learned that being quiet in church is expected. Now that I'm an adult, I appreciate sitting still and listening a bit more.
- Building a sandwich is an art.
Grilled cheese, PB&J, and cold cut sandwiches were never made, they were built. My grandmother would always say, "I'm going to build you a sandwich." She made the best sandwiches. You could taste the love in every single bite.
- You can never have too many kitchen gadgets...
Boxes and boxes and boxes are still in my kitchen. After Kevin and I got married and moved into my grandmother's home there have been so many things of hers that have popped up. Cookie press, wisks, spoons, jar openers, egg beaters.
You never know when the art monster will strike. Crayons, canvas, paint, yarn, fabric, needles, paper...you MUST have it all. Creativity is something we were created for.
- Cookies are an adequate breakfast.
During times of track out, I would spend them with my grandma and grandpa. Their morning activity of choice: walking in the mall. After this, my grandmother would sit at a table with people of similar age and talk about current events, gossip, and complete the daily crossword puzzle in the paper while they guzzled free coffee and breakfast from the mall food court. My breakfast-a cookie. Never failed. I guess I didn't qualify for the senior citizen discount at the Burger King. Cookies are better anyway.
- Appreciate dollar store barbies.
Usually after this cookie breakfast of champions, I would get to go to the dollar store. I cannot tell you how many dollar store barbies I owned, but they were mine, they were from my grandmother, and they were AWESOME.
I love you, Grandma. I hope that you are having the time of your life at Jesus' house. I miss you every day. I cannot thank you enough for teaching me, molding me, and making me a part of who I am today. You are precious.
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